Defiant Drinker Gifts

I Drank At A Bar In 2020

"Yes, I've made three resolutions - not to drink less, not to stop watching football on telly and not to spend more time at your mother's."

'You wanna play another round?' 'Sure....tender, another round!'

Happy Hour

"An everything Martini, please."

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

God taking iceburgs with ice tongs for his whisky.

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

"They know me here."

"Hard day at the office Dear? You're swigging the Balsamic Vinegar."

'The first cocktail.'

'Do you mind if I take a straw?'

"Just for once, why don't we forget the poor and blow the lot down the local tavern?"

'Just too many choices.'

"I love blue Martinis. It's like the fifties and the nineties all mixed up together."

Ginspiration!

'This cola only has half the calories, so if I only drink half that would be no calories!'

"Physician heal thyself."

"And while you're waiting for your drinks can I get you something from the bar?"

Paradise: Collection of wine

ASBOs

"I was deadwood but I'm out of a job. I guess I'm driftwood."

Welcome! Milk Convention!: 'Bourbon, milk chaser- no, make that milk, bourbon chaser.'

'Single or double?'

'Don't drink on an empty head.'

Visitor to a Landmark Tavern

The gods drink beer while Zeus throws a thunderbolt.

'Watch this - I told him the correct pronunciation of Pinot Noir is peanut noyer.'

"India ink, straight."

'I'm having what he's having.'

Belly-Swelling Tooth-Rotting Pop - Now With Up To 10 Spoonfuls Of Sugar.

"And a bag of peanuts."

"Can't keep away, eh...?"

Beefeater cocktail