Dedicated Viewer Gifts

'There's nothing worth watching on TV, but he's not going to let a little thing like that stop him.'

"The World Cup starts in two days! I'm camping out for a good spot."

"Sorry, my report is blank. I just stayed home, watched tv and played video games during vacation."

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

'Frank's last request was that he be cremated and that I never give up his season tickets.'

I am your BIGGEST fan!

"No matter the weather or what's on my plate, I'm here at five. That's discipline."

The game comes first...

Watching telly

"It's only insomnia if there's nothing good on."

Are they dangerous? Only if I shut off the tv.

TV and man

"You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to meet you."

'Everything these days is influenced by television.'

'Well at least we got him off the sofa.'

Bookstore.

The Sports Fanatic

"She died doing what she loved."

'Surely you could have missed one episode of Eastenders !!'

Religious man watching religious TV

'You can't deduct your TV as a medical expense, even if it does induce drowsiness, improve sleep patterns, and act as a mild sedative.'

'Greetings earthling! - Oh no, not in the middle of 'Oprah'!'

"They went together, doctor!"

'...To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, in rain and in snow, in hail and in gloom of night....'

"How many times are young going to playback that last episode of 'Friends'?"

'...Remember, it's only going to be broadcast once!'

'Why should I go out in the real world when I have so much reality TV?'

Who should have been nominated to baseball's hall of fame 2013...