Decoration Perfectionists Gifts

The Deconstructed Tree

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

Man and woman buying furniture.

'Quick, press control Z!'

"It took a lot of work to build this car..."

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

"I refuse to discuss my selfless passion for public service until my hair, makeup and lighting are perfect."

'I don't understand it - there was a little pile of solar dust from Advanced Composition Explorer right here a moment ago.'

Sleeping on the Job

'Well, it WAS a pretty coffee table until Dave spilled coffee on it!'

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

"Quit moving"

Social lens of the photojournalist

"There's always someone who goes over the top with their rooftop decorations."

"You didn't iron the crease in my pants!! I'm gonna look ridiculous!!"

The Scream Painting

Decorating a column.

Artist paints UNDO icon onto canvas.

"Baldo, I finally got that stain out of your favorite shirt! Of course, I had to use my scissors."

Great Painting

'Apparently he only uses fugitive colours.'

"Dang it, my eyes were closed - take another one!"

Copycat.

Think Zero Defects

'It covers well enough, but I found the recommended drying time to be completely inadequate.'

'Sometimes I wish I hadn't bought you that stupid camera for Christmas!'

"I'm not totally happy with the painting subcontractor."

More lies.

Artist and art critic

'Damn. The dark is leaking out of the dark room again.'