Home Perfectionist Gifts

"They're frantically cleaning the house! Methinks Grandma is coming this weekend..."

"First time pruning?"

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

'Quick, press control Z!'

"Al emerged from his man cave and saw crabgrass. That means 6 months of obsessing about crabgrass."

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

Perfection

Woman puts a targeting sight on her vacuum cleaner.

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

"I refuse to discuss my selfless passion for public service until my hair, makeup and lighting are perfect."

Staycation Photos

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

'I told you I only cook with my mother's Italian spices. She just left Naples and should be here with them in about eight hours.'

'I don't understand it - there was a little pile of solar dust from Advanced Composition Explorer right here a moment ago.'

'Well, it WAS a pretty coffee table until Dave spilled coffee on it!'

"You're welcome."

Sleeping on the Job

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

Social lens of the photojournalist

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

"...And then beyond the lawn, a lily pool with fountains and..."

Bazzini & Sons Lawn Service: 'We don't cut corners'.

"Let's go, this is definitely a manicured lawn: we won't find clover or dandelions here..."

Woman trying to straighten a picture of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

"I'm desperate, John. Please lend me your lawnmower."

"Come on, we're late. Your crosshatching looks fine."

"Dang it, my eyes were closed - take another one!"

"Baldo, I finally got that stain out of your favorite shirt! Of course, I had to use my scissors."

"And on the eighth day, the Lord just puttered around..." "That cloud doesn't belong there. Did I do that? I'd better move it..."

Decorating a column.

Artist paints UNDO icon onto canvas.

Mount Everest.