Debt Dabbler Pillows

'Let's go and make some unfunded spending committments.'

"I warned him not to keep his bitcoins under the mattress."

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

'The crystal ball says to buy and the 8-Ball says to sell.'

"I just finished a 10-day cleanse. Now it's time to retox."

Practice Pigs at the Gene Farm

'When did 'At Ease' become 'Chill'?'

'I can't decide whether to get a lawyer or tell the truth.'

'If we are to differentiate ourselves from the private sector we need to focus on a reorientation of our client-facing interactions to prioritise customer led positive responses to intervention scenarios.'

"My Doctor said I needed more exercise so I jogged down to the donut shop."

"When I evolve I'm going to be an elephant."

'I was going to hunt for them. Then I thought hey - why not just clone new ones!'

"But part of me hopes there never is an Armageddon."

I'm sure it's here somewhere!

A knitter's in and out boxes

'I hate his more-contagious-than-thou attitude!'

"Dad, let's play hide and go seek. I'll hide your data, and you seek it. And when you can't find it, you pay me to return it."

Dr. Reynolds finally realizes what he puts his patients through as he and his wife look at paint swatches.

'Last week I offered to bring Bixby into the decision-making process, and he's still dithering about it!'

"Do cows grunt?.... I must have milked a pig then."

Lost Property Trust - For the careless investor.

'It's just a first draft.'

Riddle behind the mask

'The bad news is that your monthly payment will be $24,089.23. The good news is that it will never increase.'

'When it comes to investing, I'm not bullish or bearish... I'm chickenish.'

Toy boat on a tsunami.

Genetically enhanced height

Now WHERE did I leave my memory stick..?

Stock Market - Ok, you've convinced me - give me one more share.

"Do you want to do that hilarious thing where we read the itemized deductions and then say 'in bed'?"

DANGER - hook and worm...!

The sign reads - CAUTION, BOTTOMLESS PIT, NOXIOUS. The LESS has now been crossed out.

'Sorry about the vessels; I can't seem to decide if I want to be a wine guy, or a beer guy.'