Debt Battler Gifts

Debt.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

U of Debt

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

Fries and kids

'Let's go and make some unfunded spending committments.'

Top Ten New Year's Resolutions

'This is our Greek debt, this is our Spanish debt, and this is our Portuguese debt...'

'It's a type of credit card that self destructs when it reaches the limit I've set for you.'

Recession

'Not only can I not find the middle class tax cut, I can't find the middle class.'

Student Debt

'Get an afterlife!'

"All I have left to cut is my lunch money."

Next Wave Collegiate Sports

'Congratulations! And please give your parents this receipt for $148 thousand.'

"I've run every test known to man, and it turns out you're allergic to medical bills."

The United States Public Debt.

'It may seem we're sinking deeper into debt, but really we're just experiencing a quarter of negative growth.'

'Thanks, I just know that I'll never be able to repay your kindness . . .'

It's 10 p.m. Do you know why stocks rise and fall, but the U.S. National debt keeps going up?

"If all countries are in debt, who's got all the money?"

"Buy stock in a college?...I don't think you can...but why would we?"

Finance Co., Refinance Co.

"Since both of us believe in reincarnation, what if I pay you all the money I owe you in the next life?"

'It's your debt to society.'

'I'm push come to shove. . .'

TELLER, 'Thirty-seven dollars? -- you call THAT overdrawn?'

"That wasn't supposed to happen!!"

Fiscal Cliff Dwellers.

"The dow is over 21,000!"

The Pessimist, the Optimist and the Obamamist.

It doesn't matter if our house is made out of bricks, we've got a sub-prime mortgage!

'When does a tax increase not sound like a tax increase?'