Dealing With Memory Issues Gifts

"Don't worry if you can't remember where the drum is, grandad. I think your internal memory is full."

Historical memory is on life support.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"I love that you still call me 'honey'."

"Remember, history was easier back in your day. There's so much more of it now."

'Trouble is they always forget to return them...'

"I cross the road to forget."

"We fell for this last time remember..."

Mafia Short-Term Memory Clinic. 'Fuhgettaboutit.'

'You did remember the condoms didn't you?'

"Once again, I simply don't recall."

"There's a wonderful book on memory tricks here, but I can't remember what I did with it!"

'No, I can't remember the name of the wine, but it did come in a bottle about this tall, if that's any help.'

Amnesia Clinic: "Take one of these pills whenever you remember to."

"I'm having trouble with my long-term memory -- I can't remember my earlier reincarnations."

Remember when?... When was that?

Study more to pass more tests.

"I seem to have forgotten what I was saying...please...hold the applause!"

"Half-full. Those were the days."

"This is one of those beautiful summer days when I'm flooded with memories of things that never happened to me."

'And tomorrow we will be having a surprise test.'

Amnesia Support Group: Meeting Today!

'Remember Sarah Palin? Remember Joe The Plumber? Remember sex?'

I used to have nightmares about forgetting my locker combination. In their nightmares, they forget passwords!

'Did I put the recycling out?'

'That's so I wont forget my wife's birthday.'

"Now that you mention it, I think that I too may have a Master's in Education."

Student to other: 'I keep forgetting to return my library books on 'boomerangs' and ... what was the other one? Oh yeah, 'memory improvement'.'

"My memory's not too good these days."

Woman says, 'How did your memory improvement class go last night?' Man answers, 'I completely forgot about it!'

"Did you ever wonder where your phone is while you're looking at it?"

Elderly man at top of stairs with a revolver and an axe: 'I've completely forgotten why I came upstairs.'

'I'm terrible with names - what's mine?'