Dealing With Memory Loss Gifts

"I just realized we missed the Alzheimer's Walk."

Memory loss

"I don't know who you are!"

'Trouble is they always forget to return them...'

". . . and now it's his memory. Three times on Saturday he asked me what day it was. Or did I already tell you that earlier?"

Mafia Short-Term Memory Clinic. 'Fuhgettaboutit.'

"There's a wonderful book on memory tricks here, but I can't remember what I did with it!"

'No, I can't remember the name of the wine, but it did come in a bottle about this tall, if that's any help.'

Study more to pass more tests.

What Do You Do When You're Caring For Someone with Alzheimer's?

"I seem to have forgotten what I was saying...please...hold the applause!"

"After Harry was gone I started decorating the house as a distraction. It was around the time I was wallpapering the driveway that I thought I should seek grief counseling."

Student to other: 'I keep forgetting to return my library books on 'boomerangs' and ... what was the other one? Oh yeah, 'memory improvement'.'

Woman says, 'How did your memory improvement class go last night?' Man answers, 'I completely forgot about it!'

"You've suffered a loss and you need time to grieve, also, tomorrow the market may turn around."

"Your husband died from medical malpractice, but it may comfort you to know that brain surgery is always risky...even when the doctor doesn't have a hangover."

"No, your body is actually alive and well back on earth - your mind has just arrived at the gates of blissful dementia."

When my memory was good, I could copy them word for word. These days, I'm lucky if I can paraphrase.

Greeting cards: Get Well, Sympathy, Pity.

'Frankly, Charles, I'm having a hard time handling our investments'.

Memory Clinic - Old What's His Name, Director.

'Has Eric been in.' 'Was I with him?.'

"Your mother says to quit bringing laundry over. She's dead."

'We're sorry for your loss. but it must be a consolation to know that his death didn't effect our targets.'

Now...what was I doing

"My memory's so bad I can plan my own surprise party."

The night

Denial Exit Now: Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance Next 4 Exits.

"My memory's terrible these days"

'This sucks. Let's try and start the wave.'

'I'm afraid that your father is dead. Dead as a Dodo.'

'Quit blubbering. This is why I hate taking you shopping.'

Memory School.

"What's the name of the drug I've been taking to improve my memory?"

"Yes, this is a used coffin. My brother was a car dealer."