Davy Crockett Admirer Gifts

"As I recall from the last session, you were born in Tennessee and raised in the woods, so you knew every tree. Then something happened when you were only three. What was that?"

Cut out and keep your own Frank Sinatra.

The Epsom Derby - Bookies

Victorian Gentleman

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways … Open Mike Night Presents Sadie Cohen. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my ladle can reach … When feeling hungry for the crunch of crouton and ideal lettuce. I love thee to the level of every day's most quiet need ... by cheesy bread and chicken wing. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I eat of thee freely, and then, at four, 'tis goodnight. O Sizzler salad bar, how do I love thee? I'm hungry.

"Do you think the world really is going to hell, or are we just getting old?"

"Things get more interesting at noon."

Margaret Thatcher as the rad queen in [Alice] Through the Looking Glass. Her clothes display symbols of her policies, such as a map of the Falkland Islands and policemen's helmets

Prison Croquet Team

Peace and Justice Return to the Joint High Commission

Little Known Historical Fact: After regaining consciousness at the last minute, Davey Crockett's coonskin cap went on to become the Alamo's only survivor.

'Hello, my name is Death'

'The records show, I took the blows and did it, the way of whatever sheep happened to be in my way.'

Fitness Club Founded in 1892

'Mess with me if you have to, son, but not with the regimental moustache!'

'That's the great Scottish Indian fighter, Hawkeye the Noo!'

The Codfather.

'We're design classics son - unchanged for hundreds of millions of years...These new gimmicky things come and go.'

Steampunk Santa

No Croquet

'Well, I for one do not believe common courtesy to the host demands deck shoes.'

'It looks pretty flimsy, but I'm a gentleman: After you dear...'

Baked Potato Seller

Whip-Behind.

Godot - Retard Indetermine

Revised tales of the old west. They used some sneaky tactics -- Really ambushed their opponents! It's been a fierce fight but seems to be turning into a massacre! He better shoot straight or it might be curtains for him! Aim carefully! Don't pull the trigger too quickly! What an epic battle! This day will become legendary! "The shootout at the croquet corral"!

'This crocodile handbag never gets nicked!'

Queen's Hotel Ambleside

'You can't just get up and leave without permission.'

Eligible Bachelor: 'Shall I follow you up, Annie; or leave myself for Lizzie?'

Cowboy reads book: 'The Joy of Tex'.

Prison sports team members hiding their faces in the team photograph

'I always need motivation to exercise. Like being chased by the cops.'

Tex knew a rattling noise meant a dangerous snake. But fortunately there was no rattle.

Steve Irwin.