Dating Warrior Pillows

Lucy is having second thoughts about this blind date.

Dorothy and the singles bar

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"The meeting will last until lunch, or hell freezes over, whichever is longer."

"'Meetingpalooza' sounded better in the brochure."

Second lifeReal life.

"Oh, please. Lord, no ... I'm only 50! No, please – anything but reading glasses!"

"Put your phones on vibrate. Maybe they'll keep you awake."

Valentine Vaccines

'And in conclusion.'

"He can never take anything serious. Everything's a joke."

"When I first met him, he was my knight in shining armour. But, he hasn't been near the metal polish in years!"

A Successful Wedding Party Returns From the Hunt

Dropping Bombs and Hearts

'Let's face it...We have irreconcilable differences!'

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

'Then again - no pain, no gain.'

Mixed Marriage: Downhill Racer.

'You're too aggressive.'

"He may be Sven the Slayer to you, but to me he's still Mr Cuddly Bun!"

"By the time we can marry in all fifty states, we'll probably be divorced."

"Zoom says we have connectivity issues..."

"I have a right to disagree! You can't force me to use logic."

'I have rather a full schedule today. Could you summarize your grievances of the past 48 years?'

"Yeah, well it hurts when you stab me with your words."

"To be honest I'd rather make love not war, but my chat-up lines are terrible."

Netflix and chill?

"Not on my watch..."

"We were about to get a divorce, but we decided instead to go with the U.N. Peacekeepers."

His side of the bed, her side of the bed, and the demilitarized zone.

ZZZZZZZoom

James and Sarah had no chance of sex with antibiotic resistant gonorrhea keeping them apart

"Well, I think there's more to life than having a terrific backhand."