Dating Scene Observer Gifts

"You reek masculinity."

There's one very important thing you should know about me. Unfortunately, I'm not going to tell you what it is.

'Yes, I'd like to see you again, but not in that jacket.'

Updated fairy tales - "Cinderella." Dating Service. It's not often we get a client looking for a specific shoe size.

"You can trust me. I wear my name on a lanyard."

'Hey baby, how 'bout we go back to my place and do a little family planning?'

''All the world loves a clown,' my foot! I haven't had a date in months.'

"I don't mind 'tongue in cheek' as long as its' my tongue and my cheek."

'Sorry to butt in, Miss, but that creature there is lying to you - he is definitely NOT Godzilla! And I should know, for I am none other than... Rodan, the Flying Monster!'

'Yes, I need to move: I'm starting to have a reputation on the bachelor scene here...'

'The Body Shop'

"So, what time do you get off?"

Flirting with death

"Let me guess. My blind date couldn't make it, so he sent his Dad instead?"

"She's just being Koi."

'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'

"I just love a nice knight out."

'He had bulging muscles and a wallet to match!'

'The blond guy is a forward and the other guy is a wing.'

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

Alligator Bars

"Hi!- standards need lowering?"

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

'Your place or mine? Both. You go to your place and I'll go to mine!'

Lonely Hearts Dating Agency - "Mmm he's a bit of a dish."

'Gosh, Cindylou, you can't judge a guy solely on how he eats spaghetti!'

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'

"I need a man who will commit."

"If they say 'Rubensesque' in their profile, they mean they're a Botero."

'Gordon is the latest in a series of unfulfilling relationships.'

"To the most beautiful girl in the world... Happy Valentine's Day!"

'You were wrong, Bob, that wasn't her come-hither look!'

'Frankly, don't bother fighting over me: I don't fancy either of you...'

Listen, I'm looking for more than just a roll in the mud!

Northern chat up lines: 'You don't sweat much for a fat lass'