Dating Scene Aficionado Pillows

"Been there. Done him."

"Call me?"

"She's just being Koi."

"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."

"I'm just saying. This would be even MORE romantic if we couldn't see in the dark."

"We met through the personals. We both were seeking someone 'Rubenesque'."

Mantis Love

"Darling, wait until you taste the new year's menu I have ordered for us!"

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

'Can Anna come out and ride?'

I'm your girlfriend and best friend so I get twice as many slices

"Most women find me too cutthroat."

"I'll be honest with you, I've been around the block a few times."

Drive in movies.

"I opened the last of the emergency wine."

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

"You lack spontaniety."

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

Dating - "Oh, and she must have a sense of humour."

"Sorry I'm late: my parents insisted I wear protection on our first date, so I stopped to buy a flea-collar..."

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

'He had bulging muscles and a wallet to match!'

"Since my divorce I thought I'd never laugh again. Then I noticed your toupee."

Biological Cuckoo clock

Banana Smoothie

"It's the wine talking. I stopped speaking to you twenty minutes ago due to lack of interest."

"I'm experiencing bouts of heavy breathing and dizziness when I'm speed dating!"

Tasty.

'That's the last time I'm sitting in the front row!'

"Ideally, I'm looking for a guy who can make me smile."

Ostrich Bar

"Oh Darling, you're spoiling me! I've never tried tropical fish!"

I can't bear to be without you.