Dating Drama Fanatic Pillows

It's the same old story...boy meets girl, boy loses girl, girl rips boy to pieces on a nationally syndicated talk show!

"I can't believe he brought her."

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

To Be. Not To Be. All Of The Above. None Of The Above.

Love Bites: The Dating Game - "No, he loves me more!"

'This isn't the kind of animal magnetism I like in a man, Frank.'

"He's a terrible drunk."

"I have gathered you all here tonight to finally reveal which one of you killed Professor Sturm!"

'What a surprise,darling - a squatter!'

"Don't walk away from me while I'm not paying any attention to you."

"I haven't finished saying no yet."

Mafia's car

"The worst part is she was sleeping with the guy she had paid to kill me."

Georgians vs Aliens

'You need to do more than rustle your plumage, sir, to woo me.'

"Was there ever a boy scout badge for 'caution'?"

'Phil and I have kissed and made up.'

No pressure

"His last words were, 'before I die, I must confess I've been unfaithful'. Then I shot him."

Wot's the row up the Court, Bill? Bob Smith was kissing my wife, and 'is old woman caught him.

'He puts on a big tough-guy front, but he cried and cried during the 'Sopranos' finale.'

Lucia di Lammermoor

"We can't go back to my place the cops are digging up the basement."

'I've just discovered how much we two have in common - including my boyfriend!'

'But enough about me, now let's talk about your money.'

It's not you, Tom. It's your, ah, um...'

"I feel like I have all this anger inside but no one special to share it with."

Speed Dating/Speed Dumping

"Isn't this romantic—just the two of us by a fire as it consumes every letter from that tramp you almost married?"

'How about giving me your phone number?. . . But I don't know your name.'

"Wanna go out sometime – soon?"

Drawing the Short Straw.