Dating Disaster Enthusiast Gifts

"I'd invite you up, but I'm trying to preserve the crime scene."

How to Meet Sluts.

Tom suspected the date wasn't going as well as he'd hoped when she asked for the Emergency exit.

'So what's your favourite sex position?'

It was to be their first, and last date.

Colin had heard that women liked honesty in men.

"I'd invite you in for coffee but my husband would probably kill you"

'1-800 GET LOST Gee, your phone number is an easy one to remember,'

'Talk about a disastrous blind date: A quick look at her teeth told me she was a lot older than she said...'

Karen decided this would be the last time she ever dated a plumber...

'You'll find there's no middle ground with Kirk Knoland.'

A child with a parasol is blown off the Chain Pier in Brighton

"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

'In the middle of the second movement, Rodney's worst fears were realized; Phillippe began to sing along.'

"I knew I should've swiped left."

'I hear Oog gave up inventing.'

'It was disgusting, Sheila...Our first date, and he pulls out his endpin!'

"Your blind dates is at the bar - I'll upgrade you to a table by the getaway door."

"Do I have a personal preparedness plan in case of a national emergency? Well, if screaming while running amok is a plan, then yes, I have a plan."

Continental Drift will end in disaster when the Arctic collides with the Antarctic and matter collides with anti-matter and explodes.

"My love for you knows no bounds, Trish."

He couldn't put his finger on it but something told Colin the date wasn't going well.

"I walked up to this hot girl with two drinks in my hands, and she turned to me, smiled and said, are you lost, Grandpa? The toilets are back there."

"When you said on your profile you are 'loyal and affectionate' I expected something a little different."

'My Mother makes me wear this - It's my name and address in case I get lost.'

'Hand me your issue of esquire. I have a hot date.'

Geek Todd Jones strikes out with his 3000th wiman to take over third place on the all time geek strikeout list.

"How come I always pick the bastards?"

"So now I guess I'll have to meet your friends."

"Public display of rejection"

"I see you've never dated a clairvoyant before."

"A MacArthur, the lecture circuit, and thou!"

"He was a lousy date!"

Mother Nature