Data Security Enthusiast Gifts

"We need to start listening to our customers."

"Maybe now's not the time to tell him his data has also been leaked."

"Well, if it isn't Roy Pendleton, age 51, five foot nine, 176 pounds, two kids, recently divorced... Yes, I know everything about you, Mr. Pendleton but, then, information is my business!"

'Where was the TSA?'

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

A Little Extra

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

"The new computer is great, but we can't get rid of the old one. It knows too much."

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

"These targeted ads are getting out of hand."

CCTV in church.

"Get used to verifications. In the court of the internet, you are presumed a robot until proven otherwise."

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

"Hackers, Sire! They've broken through our firewall."

Who are the most important people at the World Cup?

"This is Alexander. He’ll be heading up our hacking division."

The Ayatollah Bomb?

'Since PRISM, nothing is 'off the record' any more.'

"Are you sure you updated the anti-virus software?"

Biro Security

"Some fine day, my son, all this will be yours."

"I don't think I can be truly happy unless I have more passwords."

"Rest assured, anything you say in this office won't get repeated by me."

'It's a foolproof computer network, sir, that no one can break into, not even a kid.'

'This biometric ID badge is part of the new security system. The badge contains my encoded retinal scan, fingerprints, and level of job enthusiasm.'

"Tell me when it's all cyber warfare, and I'll enlist!"

"Fifth robbery this week. That's not a security camera ??" a local TV news station installed it to save time."

"Don't mind me, folks, I'm just here for regular system maintenance."

"If you're my gramma you wouldn't have a problem consenting to a retina scan!"

IT security.