Dark Humor Joy Seeker Gifts

Meat Grinder

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

"I didn't spark joy."

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

'... And this is my cellar.'

Another day at work would be one too many...

'Now they're just taking the piss.'

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

Out To Lurch

Dead Funny

'The cash bonus incentives don't appear to be having the desired results. So, I've hired Rocky, here. He'll be providing the heads of the least productive departments with his own brand of incentive. If you know what I mean.'

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

Murder in Apartment 6-K

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

"I can never remember - do these go in garbage or compost?"

"O.K., time's up. Pencils down."

You're dead to me, Marsha. And that's just the way I like it."

Who gets the anti-corona vaccine?

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

"Where do you see yourself in 20 to 25 years?"

The practical psychopath

"It's such a beautiful day. Why don't we go out and get someone to eat?"

End the Winter Blues

MUSHROOM MASACRE.