Dark Humor Explorer Gifts

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

'But I friended you on Facebook!'

'This is a money order.'

'Feet!'

Wealth and Hellbeing.

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

'... And this is my cellar.'

'Now they're just taking the piss.'

Another day at work would be one too many...

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

Dead Funny

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

Out To Lurch

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

'The cash bonus incentives don't appear to be having the desired results. So, I've hired Rocky, here. He'll be providing the heads of the least productive departments with his own brand of incentive. If you know what I mean.'

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

Zombies.

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

Murder in Apartment 6-K

"Needs to get a life"

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

"O.K., time's up. Pencils down."

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

End the Winter Blues

MUSHROOM MASACRE.