Cute When Wrong Club Member Gifts

'Aaaawww...You're cute when you are wrong.'

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

'Yes, it's a stupid speech, Senator, but you've got to court the stupid VOTE.'

Maybe we should stop calling it 'The Masters.'

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

Are you interested in UFOs? Advanced life forms? Free medical screenings? Alternative underwear? Snacks and refreshments? Non-sexual turtles? Reverse pound cake? Science? Join us.

'Your tweets have quite a following.'

"You'll learn a lot at our book club...like how to read between the wines."

Alfred Marquez, Probate Attorney - Heir club for men.

'We took a look at our passport pictures and realized we need a vacation.'

Niche Extracurriculars

'Let me get this clear. You want me to give you paternity leave before the baby is born.'

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

'These are my 'golfing socks'... there's a hole in one!'

'That guy is SO tacky.'

'... and in a startling development, 5 Supreme Court decisions were overturned by Judge Judy...'

Men drinking

Pole Vaulting Club

The chefs were helping local actors who were tired of having short roles... by giving them a long loaf!

'9K a year!? It's an outrage! At my level of attendance that's 3K per lecture!'

"I want to report a race crime.'

'Don't start an argument - you know how you hate intravenous feeding.'

'Well, if I weigh that much after only putting one foot on, I don't think I have the courage to continue!'

"It's not you. It's pea."

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

'It's a deal -- I'll introduce a bill to bail out your country club, and you'll introduce a bill to bail out my country club!'

'He's lying about either a fish or his penis.'

'Boy Scouts aren't ANY kind of terrorists!'

Hamlet

'Fair play, Bill always knows when he's had enough.'

Golf Myth #293--Ball Washer

Ok, I know a sarcastic slow clap when I hear one.

Late again.

'We are banned from reporting inside that country, so instead our correspondent joins us from the Dog and Duck, just around the corner.'

"He seems to have done a complete turnaround."