Customer Service Worker Gifts

'What, no onion rings?'

'I'm really pressed for time this morning. Could you just go ahead and pour that in my lap for me?'

"There's a fly in my soup! What's the meaning of this?"

Welcome! We're the big box store that never forgets your face.

"Heh...some crazy customer...wanting a pine tree air freshener...delivered."

"We don't do a lot of street haggling in this town."

Pizza Delivery Delays

Complaint Department worker. 'Gosh, I'm good at this job!'

'I think I've got one, Doris!'

'My new keyboard? Thank you, sir, it's very useful!'

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

Regretting buying a computer from a franchise rather than a local store.

A man at a complaint clerk uses a paddle ball by holding the ball.

Take a number, R.

"I quit! You can commiserate with ole Mr. ChatGPT from now on."

'Eat your lunch.' 'No, it's toxic waste.'

'That's eleven..!!' ( 10 items or less counter ).

"Remember, the customer is always right!"

Travel, 22nd Century: 'They teleported my luggage and right leg to Tokyo.'

"I'll be your waiter, folks, and I hope you'll be patient. We're a little short-handed tonight."

Salad bar raking.

STRIP Deaf and Mute complaints desk attendant

'LOVE that hint of sarcasm in your ‘HAVE A GREAT DAY!''

"Well, another year is coming to a close. I'd like to thank you for a job well done, Nemesis." "I just serve coffee." "Yes, but you do it so poorly, as if you have the coordination of a two-year-old. And every word out of your mouth is vapid and narcissistic. Day in and day out, you have provided me with a slovenly example of youth that makes me feel very, very good to be old. So... good job." "Thank you for being you, loser!" "I love being important."

Is your tap water free? Of course, fine sir. So is everything in it: The pollutants and chemicals … the countless microorganisms that cause allergies and grotesque diseases … all of which cost far more money to treat than the cost of bottled water. (Sigh) Fine. One bottle water, please. That'll be $6.99. I'm not sure what's worse: Countless microorganisms of one big greedy macroorganism. I'm done filling all the bottles from the tap, boss.

Do you validate? What? No, there's not parking lot. It's just street parking and that's free. I know. But I came in to get a coffee yesterday morning at 7:59. The line was so long that I didn't get out of here till 8:02. Apparently you had street cleaning that started at 8a.m. I'm not following. It was your long line. The least you could do is validate the parking ticket they gave me. Get out.

"Can you make me a tall Tazo chai latte with soy milk?" Bartleby, the soon-to-be-unemployed barista.

"Disgruntled ticket-taker Joshua Kalen is pushed to the edge..."

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"My email is down... talk to me."

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"