Custodial Staff Gifts

"Desktops are off-limits. Anything on the floor is sweepers-keepers."

'I can't work with computers, on account of my animal magnetism.'

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

Dogs stealing cat food - Vice Squad orders 'Stay!'

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

'Let's pretend I'm a business owner and you're the janitorial service...'

Privacy Conference Security

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

Bathroom Fairy

"So, how was your day at work, Dear?"

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

"Not guilty?"

Womb service: A special room service for pregnant Women

Whittler's Mother.

"The club scene is really changing."

"And it comes with a coin filter for when you vacuum under the cushions."

'Says here you can tear phonebooks in half? Well, security could use a man like you in our shredding department!'

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'

Private Viewing

Graffiti on guard's horse

"Recess is over, Your Honor."

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

Dust Bunny

'If you'll excuse me, my car is on fire.'

"The security scanner said I have exquisite feet."

"His name? It's 'Reggie the Drug-Sniffing Dog.'"

Mad cleaning robot.