Curveball Critic Gifts

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

"Try to get him away from that bloody whip...Pass it on."

'My dentist recommended it.'

"My therapist said next time he tries to put his head in my mouth I've to politely refuse"

Then and Now.

"It's all good – but some of it is better."

"Wow! That's a mean curveball."

"We seem to be the only animals here."

Bull with gun

"Kids terrify me."

'So much for the question of whether of whether or not a curveball really curves.'

'Isaac Newton, pursuing his study of the laws of motion,, discovers that a thrown ball can curve..."

"To be perfectly honest, I don't mind the riders, it's the clowns I'm afraid of..."

Center for psychokinetic research.

'You've got 2 left feet'

'Baseball isn't a sport?'

'Uniformaly accelerated motion...'

"For God's sake, it's only a game!"

"The refereeing was only half bad... the winning team didn't complain."

No shoes, No shirt, No Service.

Sue Gray Report

'This pitcher throws screwballs. Better hand me my 'special' bat.'

"I must confess, I'm starting to prefer basketball to baseball."

If symptoms persist sue your doctor.

Social comment on the time-honoured tradition of attaching a Just Married sign to the newlyweds car

Erractic Review

'Come in Justin, I just finished marking your exam.' - Grade Scale

'...Your high wire act isn't that impressive.'

"Oh yes, Mother. Jason really loves the sweater you've knitted him for Christmas."

"I sense a certain ambivalent bounce in your pitches...and it makes me feel vulnerable."