Curtain Guru Gifts

David wasn't sure about the idea of having denim curtains.

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

Handbag store - "Perfect."

'We live in difficult times. These underwear don't help one bit.'

'She's so put together!'

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

A women in a shoeshop.

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

Keeping warm.

"The derby is better. That makes you look like Abraham Lincoln."

"Absolutely not!"

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

Mr Metrosexual.

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

I don't think I'm letting sunlight in when I open the curtains. I think the darkness is going out.

At the suit makers

'Do you like my little black number?'

"Then, after college, I joined the navy. Wait, I think I hear him coming."

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

"It's the only way I can justify buying so many shoes."

His and Her wardrobe's

"Everybody should live in a market economy. It's terrific."

"A naked dress is perfect when you have nothing to wear."

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

'Do you have anything a little longer in the leg ?'

'And when you're done here honey, I have a nice periwinkle picked out for the foyer!'

"That shirt is so last year."

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

The Venus Flytrap Leather Sectional

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"