Curry Adventurers T-Shirts

'We also sell water for $200 a glass.'

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

'Chocolate milk, carrot cake,candied yams...see, there's a solution to everything!'

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

"Vindaloo hot enough?"

Two fishermen land on stumps. Man says to other, 'Is that enough structure for ya?!'

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

"Fresh pepper?"

'Strong curry for two and a fire-extinguisher.'

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

The Velvet Mesquite

"The food here is excellent- what time is breakfast?"

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.

Acme Foods. Research and Development. Then it's an "no" on the Mexican Jumping Bean Dip?

'Waiter, I think my wife's calamari is underdone.'

'There's no mention of stuffing. Keep going until you get to the sugar and spice.'

Little Pink Girl and Her Pink Horse

Sushi Train Spotters

"That's the deep end."

"Careful it's hot." (Colour)

'All the kings horses and all the king's men? No, I'm calling my cousin Louie, he owns a restaurant!'

'Is this the new product?' - 'Yes, a rocket filled with cornflakes.'

Never use a cookbook written by a mystery book author. You never know how things will turn out!

'All our family's creativity is channelled into finding ways to gain weight.

"I'm sorry, your grapefruit subscription ran out and I forgot to renew it."

'Can't we have something other than curry for a change?'

"I'm using this travel site to map out a trip to the land of Everything's Deep Fat Fried."

"I'm following the paleo diet. Not that there's much choice, of course."

"Fancy an Indian?"

"To accompany a dish of Fire Ants, I would recommend a Chateau Condat 92..."

"I'll have the chef."