Curriculum Challenger Gifts

"Why should an unusual guy like me be give a standardized test?"

"Walden'?! Are you insane? Do you have any idea how elusive transcendental philosophy is to a 13-year-old prepubescent juvenile delinquent?!"

"So, Mrs. Miller, would you tell me briefly your methods for teaching reading, your overall philosophy of education, your views on testing, your ideas on discipline, your opinions about homework, the ways you could excite kids about science, and how you would upgrade math skills in our school should you be hired?"

"Answer your question? You mean in real time?"

Christian school student tries to change subject.

"It says 'break glass' but it doesn't say what glass!'

Tension filled the tent.

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

"Lori, go ahead and toss in 'Lolita.' Now, what's next?" "We'll need more lighter fluid." "'The Lottery' is devils work." "We must protect the children." "Book burning club"

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

"I want to make it before I hit thirty."

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

"We thought this was more realistic."

'And from this point follow me very carefully.'

'You'll never be the next Micheal Phelps if you don't start working on your breaststroke.'

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

"It'll never be ready in time."

"I want to set the world record for eating the most empanadas ever!"

'This is going really well. I did a great job organizing this lecture.'

'What we were about to receive has gone the way of all flesh.'

"History test? But I studied all night for a math test!"

Kate's first task as new principal was to right a number of wrongs.

End school zone. Start unschool zone.

'LOOK RENOLDSON, i've had JUST about enough of your moaning and groaning! IF you can't stand the heat, GET out of the oven!' / A chef scolding his apprentice inside an oven.

"There's a free pudding for whoever finds the Chef's glass eye."

"When are you going to make the sort of bread my mother makes?"

'I've gotten over my fear of tests, but now I seem to have developed studying anxiety.'

'...no you can't phone a friend!'

'I'd like to see him do that with your cooking...'

'I want to speak with you about your work habits.' 'You mean work is habit forming?'

"Come on, let me see the picture."

Dieter sees 'Enter at own risk' sign on refrigerator

"How come we have so many cookery books cluttering up the kitchen?...I mean, you obviously don't read any of them."

'Not getting into university is not going to stop me doing the things I hoped to do...'