Curb Conquerors Gifts

Actual Extent Of Doug's Off - Road Adventures (Touching the kerb)

'He got a raise but not enough to help him clear the fence.'

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

Commutobile

"When the slowest car in the fast lane don't go any slower than the fastest car in the slow lane."

'But you said to clean my room.'

Yoga To-Do

'There's an app you can program to delete your trash? I've had one for years called Dave.'

"He said his screen is frozen again."

"On the weekend I finally beat the club pro...so I don't need you anymore!"

"Jones is our go-to-thankless-job-guy!"

'I hate running in the outside lane.'

"I'm going to be vacuuming, if you want to go into the farthest room and start asking me questions."

'It's your turn to put the cat out.'

'I'm 43 years old. That's 64 in work years.'

"Of course I care about the environment, I never throw any clothes away."

"Sometimes Bob just needs a little motivation to get things done around here!"

'Since it's Mother's Day, we'd like you to take the day off.'

'No good deed goes unpunished around here.'

Monday morning is nigh.

"Walking down here and asking if I can get you some more detergent from the store is just the beginning of my fence-mending agenda."

Whack-A-Chore: "You play it all day, every day, until you can't anymore."

A Learning Curve.

"How was your day?"

'You can't keep a middle school girl from wanting to impress boys, Valerie.'

"I see myself rising through the ranks of the organization until midlife, when I will most likely hit a wall and go screaming through the door."

"No monsters under this bed! After I cleaned there's no room."

"I guess breakable things need to be more careful around me."

'Really, it will be fine. Go home and give it a try. Wash lights with lights and darks with darks.'

"You've been so productive lately, I've decided to lay the entire staff off so you can do their work as well."

Bear Office Worker

"How many cubicles do you think this will penetrate?"

Cleaner being carried away on a magic carpet.

'No breakfast until you're finished making your bed, Joey.'

"It's worth a try! Maybe someone up there knows how to fold a fitted bedsheet!"