Cultural Ceremonies Gifts

The Christening Party

Hoskins was invited to take part in the nicorette patch of peace ceremony

Lesbian civil partnership.

Mardi Gras

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."

'Oh my God. I love it!'

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

Bacchus.

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

"Happy St Patrick’s Day"

Bubbly

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

Dancing Doctor

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

Cardiac Recovery.

'Okay.. what the hell.'

"Fred's had too much to drink - now he's hitting on that old coat rack."

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

'Apparently the stag party has gone into extra time.'

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

"Attention, everyone! Here comes Poppa, and we're going to drive dull care away! It's quips and cranks and wanton wiles, nods and becks and wreathed smiles."

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

Chritmas Party - "What in our own time?"

Happy Turkey Day!