Culinary Fan Pillows

Wordilly Durdillies - Fan assisted oven.

'Whoever called this job WAITING obviously never did it!'

'I think the microwave has finally given up the ghost.'

'I sent out for everything.'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

Before/After

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

Baker Romance

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'I was in the catering corps.'

'Does this thing get channel four.'

Feast

"What's happened to Quiche?"

The Perfect Foil

"Room for dessert, folks?"

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

Cookery Lesson.

Great moments in 'Haute Cuisine'. . . America gives the world the Donut Sandwich.

Doctor uses thermometer to check chicken.

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

The perfect man