Culinary Cleric T-Shirts

The Pope cooking some popadoms for Popes

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Soup of the month.

Garden.

Too much cilantro

Recipes from the Jean-Paul Sartre Cookbook

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

Holiday Supplies

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

"Hmm...I LOVE chocolate chip ice cream...!"

I love Cannelloni

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

"Staring down the enemy in the heat of battle! That is how sausage is made!"

"Please don't kill me."

Fly Tastings: 'Notice that hint of dog fur and then let that full bodied garbage finish unfold.'

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

Victorian Fast Food - 'I'll have the lark pie festooned with eels, a full stilton, two bottles of port,,,'

'10,000 years and no one's improved on the idea of meat on a stick!'

'We're not at home, Stu. You can't just order 'I don't care'.'

Doctor uses thermometer to check chicken.

"Marions nous! Tu payes les impôts, j'offre le resto!"

Junior Masterchef - "Darren Smith and I'll be cooking chicken nuggets with Mars bars in a CocaCola sauce"

The perfect man

"Steak, Richard, is just grown up veal."

"Namasteak"

"Cut down on the pumpkin spice."

The boss is truly a courageous risk-taker. Only he tasted the salmon mousse at last year's company picnic.

"Honey, close the fridge door while you're thinking!"

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

"I see the businessman's lunch is up 50p."

'You don't appreciate anything I cook!'

"Honey, I’ll take over. The stir-fry has suffered long enough."