Cubicle Master Gifts

"They really expect a lot from us."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"I'm thinking of turning this home office into a man-cubicle."

"At this office no two days are different."

Another day at work would be one too many...

Work Slave

Man suffering from rope burn due to climbing the corporate ladder

"Yes, social media's a great way to express your opinions - shame you feel 'ignored and unappreciated by an aloof, faceless boss' - but that's because I haven't a clue who you are or what you do around here!"

"We should have taken the cubicles."

'Parsloe, your desk is blocking the corporate food chain.'

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

"I tell you, it's a jungle out there!"

"Give a man a job, and he'll work all day. Teach a man to delegate, and he'll take the rest of the day off."

"All this namby pamby nonsense about stress...I've been stressed for YEARS and it's never done ME any harm... " "But you're only 25!"

Busy day at the office.

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

At Lego corporate headquarters.

The Picture of Dorian Gray's Soul.

"The quicksand was corporate's idea. I wanted to fire you for going over my head. They wanted to send a message."

'Miss Johnson, would you mind ordering me another computer? And you can cancel that call to tech-support.'

Stacked In Tray

One day, he hoped to hit the big time.

When the accounts department took the stationary cupboard Bob decided to book the Conflict Management course.

'I can't figure out whether I'm a secretary or an executive - I do executive work, but get secretarial pay.'

Tired - Stressed - Tired.

'I need a smarter computer.'

"Word is that since we increased your case load, you've been living at the office."

'I wanted shorter hours, so he cut my breaks.'

"A watched file never loads..."

'When the poor dear retired, he found that he missed his little cubicle.'

'Stop mumbling, George! We all had to start somewhere...'

Paper Trail

'If you have a problem, take it up with the boss. His door is always open.'