Cubicle Kingpin Gifts

Lemonade Inc.

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

Overworked in the office

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

Another day at work would be one too many...

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

'Parsloe, your desk is blocking the corporate food chain.'

Work Slave

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

'Ms. Snack, prepare the conference room for an executive sting.'

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

"All this namby pamby nonsense about stress...I've been stressed for YEARS and it's never done ME any harm... " "But you're only 25!"

Do not think outside the box!

Mr. Blok goes bowling.

'Walter, stop fantasizing and get back to your desk.'

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

Whack, Out of Whack.

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

Will work for Food Network.

'Only another thirty-four years, five months and fourteen days until I retire.'

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

'I'm 43 years old. That's 64 in work years.'

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

"The quicksand was corporate's idea. I wanted to fire you for going over my head. They wanted to send a message."

"If they don't show up soon I'll have to admit I forgot to invite them."

'Are these billable hours?'

"Jones is our go-to-thankless-job-guy!"

Stacked In Tray

One day, he hoped to hit the big time.

"I miss the old cubicles."