Crisis Conqueror Gifts

Vikings behind you, a scary monster to the side...

"Congratulations on getting your 'Courage Under Fire By Media' award."

My job is to put out fires.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this seminar is about how to make profits in times of crisis..."

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

Rage.

What My Day Feels Like

Keeping warm.

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

"Unfortunately, there's no cure—there's not even a race for a cure."

'Call the boss! We're in trouble!'

'You'll never believe the day I've had...'

Second lifeReal life.

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

Trays on desk read: In/Out/Lose in the Shuffle.

A guide to seasons in the North East

Finally! A cure for the common cold!

'Are you kidding, Billy? We climbed all the way up Everest and you forgot the freaking sleds?!'

In Tray, Out Tray, and Shredded Paper Tray

"Miss Jones! Clear my schedule until I get this sorted out!"

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

IN OUT UP DOWN AND ALL AROUND

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

"Let's take it again from the top...but this time with more fillings."

College student cleans messy dorm room littered with clothes with leafsnow blower

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

"So I bought this doohickey that is very good with chaos."

"My name is Van Gelsing, Madame. I'm an expert in cleaning teenagers' rooms. If you need me, just give me a call, okay?"

The inevitable conflict of interest facing every crisis manager.

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

'I can't remember the title,but it was on a little white piece of paper.'

"Where do you see yourself in five moves?"

Man in bookstore is looking at a large section of books devoted to stock market crash predictions.

Arctic Weather vs Utility Bills

Euro crisis: abandon ship.