Criminal Justice Professional Gifts

Knife Crime Data Collection - 'How many people have you stabbed this week?'

'We've had him tagged.'

'Identity theft, eh? -- Just who do you think you are?'

'I went to a very special school. You had to be sent there by a judge.'

HM prisons are all full.

'You can expect to get twenty years for this, and I don't mean 'doggie years'!'

To save the state the expense of a trial, I'll run off to Spain.

"Hey, you! Where is my money? What kind of for-profit prison is this, anyway?"

'OVERCROWDED-I'll say it's OVERCROWDED!'

Department of corrections has statue of white out correctional fluid in front of building.

"Thou shalt not kill. It's a sin. But people still commit murders, I'm happy to say. And the state kills the murderers...I'm twice as happy to say."

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

'They're letting you out on parole. But I've spent the last two years digging an escape tunnel.'

Probation Officer

'Too tight?'

'The prisons are full, so I'm releasing you back into the wild.'

Old West Bounty Hunter.

'We are no longer called criminals! We're called 'Legally Disadvantaged'.'

What becomes of unwanted children.

'It's the latest electronic free-tracking tag...'

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

'Hi, I'm your new genie. Your old genie has been arrested for influencing peddling, bribery and misuse of power.'

'That does not make it all right!'

"Heads or entrails?"

"Five to ten years of bad accordion music...OMG!"

"I miss the good old days when you were a number instead of a bar code."

"How many crimes are you going to get me off and commit me back into those hell-hole streets out there!?"

Fair Cop

"Detective Harris, NEXT TIME you use police officers in a line-up for witness identification. . . please don't have them show up in uniform!"

"See you later. Do you want the door closed?'

How's My Stop & Searching?

"Hey, Conroy, your lawyer is here."

I blame society for putting me here. But mostly I blame metallurgy for keeping me here.

Containment Cops

Suicide Kits for Sale