Crime Series Fan Gifts

"We have our conclusion, now we need the evidence!"

Back in 2 to 5 years.

'I ain't saying nothing without my literary agent!'

'I do my bit to keep crime off the streets...I stay in one night a week.'

'God, how I hate bent coppers.'

"But, I don't want to call you 'Daddy'. Can't I just call you by your actual name?"

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

Cat Burglar

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

Minority Report

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"'A body at rest'? -- Are you writing murder mysteries now, Isaac?"

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

Whodunnit. Whoreallydunnit.

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

"#notguilty."

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

'I hate frisking magicians!'

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

"Ask the gumshoe. He'll tell ya the saucer was empty when I got there. Go on, gimme a purr detector test. I got all night."

Lawn Order. It's a landscaping show about maintaining a tidy yard.

'Hey, buddy -- can you keep a secret?'

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'