Crime Scene Comedy Lover Gifts

"What part of ‘secure the crime scene’ don’t you understand?!!"

Oh, sorry, I didn

'Yes, it was number 4, I'm positive,'

Get back, Copper! Or the marrow gets it

'He killed the teacher, then himself.'

'We hears this loud pop and when we turned around he was like this!'

'Do you work this neighborhood often?'

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

'What worried me most is identity theft.'

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

Just our luck...old school crime translation classes!

'I don't care how you do it...just make it look like an accident.'

"I said freeze, punk, I didn't mean literally!"

'Yes, folks, the victim was a bolt. Now, I'm afraid, he's a deadbolt.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

"Wear a wire? Oh, no, all of our police informants have gone wireless."

'Not much cop are you!'

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

"One crime on this island and everyone's a suspect!"

Police Lineup Escape

"Well, obviously the victim had a French enemy."

"You're under arrest for an attempted murder."

Parachuting with Concrete Shoes

"Embezzlement is now called virtual bank robbery."

'Give Me All The Money In My Account'

'Don't you people ever take a pulse? ! '

'I'm afraid that driving the getaway car is more than just a driving offence, Mr. Jones.'

'I won't be able to look up your account right now. Our computers have been impounded by the authorities.'

'Don't Move!' - 'Why would I want to move? Lived here for 51 years, know all the neighbours, shops nearby, post office is closed but...'