Crime Comedy Lovers Gifts

'The insider traders always sit together.'

Grand theft auto … you? Plagiarism. 13625A 13625A

We're very disappointed. We thought the nanny has raised you better than this. Precinct.

"How do I know that banana is really loaded?"

'I never should have downloaded that Mafia ring tone.'

'Sorry Rocko, you know how it works. Step on a crack, break your mother's back.'

Worst escape attempt ever.

'Criminal mastermind.'

'...And this little piggy knocked over a liquor store....'

'Sorry, they all smell the same to me.'

"Oh, damn it! We are trapped!"

'Make it look like an accident'.

'A guy on the phone says he's stolen your identity, but thinks you and him might get on, do you want to go for a pint with him?'

'Yes inspector, it's another cold blooded murder!'

'Actually, I'm completely legit - I make a living appearing in police lineups.'

"Dammit, Trevor! Just say 'Please' so we can get outta here!"

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

'What worried me most is identity theft.'

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"I said freeze, punk, I didn't mean literally!"

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

'I don't care how you do it...just make it look like an accident.'

Just our luck...old school crime translation classes!

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

'Not much cop are you!'

"Wear a wire? Oh, no, all of our police informants have gone wireless."

"Listen, that's a Tang Dynasty urn we just broke."

Police Lineup Escape

"One crime on this island and everyone's a suspect!"

"Embezzlement is now called virtual bank robbery."