Crime And Decor Connoisseur T-Shirts

"Dang. Empty. What about the painting? Wouldn't it look great in our den?"

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

The Philip Marlow family

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"Don't editorialize."

"Number 2. Step forward please."

'Keep an eye on that one. He looks like a sketchy character to me.'

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

"Take your time, sir. Tell me if you can see the thief."

'I think I can solve our budget problem with the color scanner, color laser printer and this twenty-dollar bill!'

'Make it look like an accident.'

Gangster's To-Do List

Ignorance of the Law

Hanging Mime - Such a waste of talent.

"I believe this is a case for Sherlock Holmes..."

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."

"The robber was about 5' 11"...."

'Was Monty the culprit? Had he fixed a horse race? He couldn't remember.'

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

Crime Writer's Society.

Exposed and imprisoned.

A convict escaping during the press scrum

Washing line with robber outfit and swag bag hanging up to dry.

'You've not been involved with money laundering before have you Joe!'

'Have you found a precedent? Yes, you did the same crime in 1974.'

'Emotional blackmail.'

'Jimmy. Stick to the outline.'

You know retail is in a bad way when...

'Brilliant writing, Mr. Fenswick, but I'm afraid we'll have to pass on your 'How to Commit the Perfect Crime'!'

" . . . the victim was slowly roasted until golden brown and then. . . Oh my gawd! Stuffed with bread and savory herbs and spices!"