Crime And Craft Aficionado T-Shirts

"It started with cutting letters out of magazines for ransom notes, now he's really into scrapbooking."

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

'Ah Mr Bond, I haven't been expecting you...'

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"Don't editorialize."

"Number 2. Step forward please."

'They're very proud of me. I'm the first in my family to be convicted of a white-collar crime.'

'Keep an eye on that one. He looks like a sketchy character to me.'

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

"You're not grandma at all! In fact, I think this is a case of identity theft!"

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

Notorious gangsters, Bunny and Clyde.

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

The Ballad of the Lavender Dot - Part Three

"Take your time, sir. Tell me if you can see the thief."

'Oh, hello Dave. Would you like that in untraceable, used notes, like last time?'

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

Gangster's To-Do List

"I can now fetch anything you want - on Etsy."

Ignorance of the Law

'Make it look like an accident.'

"Your Honor, I wish to introduce as Exhibit A this bullet with the victim's name on it."

"... No, when I say, 'you must let go of the past' I mean you must return that vase to the museum you took it from."

WANTED The Strad Cad

'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'

Exposed and imprisoned.

Washing line with robber outfit and swag bag hanging up to dry.

'Did you get the hit man Frankie?'

"I almost got away with it! Then somebody called in the SWAT team!"

Fake Counterfeit Money

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."

'Was Monty the culprit? Had he fixed a horse race? He couldn't remember.'