Credit History Collector Pillows

"To open a new credit account, I need to see some credit history."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Bingo! Credit card number!! The real reason raccoons like garbage.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"It's translated from French, so where it says 'Harvard Business School' it may mean 'jail.'"

'I got and 'E' in spelling.' - 'That is an 'F'.'

You can tell when the blades get dull on your rotary nose-hair clippers.

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'Our tabby was pre-approved for a credit card!'

"I'm afraid these grades aren't giving me a very satisfying vicarious life."

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'Well, so my grades are A,B,C,D... at least I'm learning my alphabet.'

'Just tell him you mind your teacher and do your lessons. You don't have to prove it.'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

'Thanks, I just know that I'll never be able to repay your kindness . . .'

"I've been an accountant, an actuary, an advertising exec, an administrator, an architect, an art director, and an auditor, and now I'd like to move on to the B's."

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"I wonder what this was for."

Financial landscape.

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"This house has been in my family for a considerable period of time."

'How old is this vase?'

An angry Driver stuck behind the 8 Ball.

'Your entire library consists of nothing but tabloids bound in Corinthian leather?'

"Daddy says God created Eve out of Adam´s spare credit card!"

Secret Identity Theft.

"Keep up the good work and there'll probably be a nice promotion in it for me."

"I never expected you to pay through the nose."

Misery lit...

AL'S GYM, 'We're going to make a new man of you!' 'Will he have new credit cards?'

'...but the good new is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'