Creative Transport Gifts

Patient with a drip on a micro scooter.

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

The writer: something who devotes a lifetime of solitude to the same of communication.

Ninedency: A budding tendency

Direct Marketing...

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

Wordplay: Export.

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

"Mom, come quick. Dad's in a stupor."

I'm not sure which, but he's just invented either writing or vandalism. (Published originally on Feb. 11, 2011.)

Building Blocks.

"It's been hell since you went into animation."

Target your message

Do you suppose this is art or science?

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

"My buildings are meant to inspire."

Jungle Taxi

'Is this any way to treat a budding genius?'

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

Advertising and PR Agency: 'I'm able to spin at 60 words per minute, hype at 50 words and distort at 45 words.'

You can't fool all of the people all of the time, especially with our advertising budget.

This one's mixed media--- I had jelly on my hands while finger-painting.

"It looks like we've reached the end of reality..."

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

Prehistoric Modern Art

Doubledecker bus stop

'Don't be hard on the boy, dear, I'm sure that Van Gogh's first sunflowers weren't so hot.'

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

"You know what I wish? I wish there was a foundation that gave grants just to lie fallow for a year or so."

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

Two New Paintbrushes

'Figures can be misleading - So I've written a song which I think expresses the real story of the firms performance this quarter.'

"I appreciate succinct memos, Phillips, but stop writing them all in Haiku!"

'Actually, when I asked you to bring something fresh to the table, I was talking about ideas!'