Creative Pun Lover Pillows

'Oil painting is fine, but I can't do watercolours, obviously...'

Next cartoon - 5 minutes...

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

Do it yourself books.

"It can't be much of a life working all day, but at least he gets to wear a stripey jersey."

"He refuses to use these now they've made them gender nonspecific."

'I see adventure in your future. Yes. You're going to be a culinary adventure.'

"Think about the honey."

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

'You wanted a speedy trial, so I'm sentencing you to a swift kick.'

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

I was starting a new chapter in my life and I tripped over a footnote.

No, that's "Virginia Wolf" with one "o."

Ghost Scare-apy Sessions

'And in conclusion...'

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

'I'm writing you a prescription for some people soup.'

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

Literate Dogs.

Hotness

'In the circumstances, I think we should skip the housewarming party.'

"I washed my kilt last night , now I can't do a fling with it!"

"I can't log-on. Some-one disabled cookies."

'I collect a different type of oil painting.'

The static electric eel is very rare.

Hell's Schlegel

'Yes, of course they're prints.'

'You give me goose bumps!'

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

"Of course you're bored, sweetie. It's the fin de siècle."

"Waiter, there aren't any flies in my soup!"

Weather forecast

Larry's Literary Market.

'It's for my teacher. Do you have one with love spelled right?'