Humorous Pun Lover Pillows

"Avast - it's Mobius Dick, the one-sided whale."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"It can't be much of a life working all day, but at least he gets to wear a stripey jersey."

"Think about the honey."

'I see adventure in your future. Yes. You're going to be a culinary adventure.'

"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

'Oil painting is fine, but I can't do watercolours, obviously...'

'And in conclusion...'

'I'm writing you a prescription for some people soup.'

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

"Extreme? Maybe. But I have the best behaved school in the district."

Hotness

Literate Dogs.

'In the circumstances, I think we should skip the housewarming party.'

"I washed my kilt last night , now I can't do a fling with it!"

'I collect a different type of oil painting.'

Larry's Literary Market.

Hell's Schlegel

The static electric eel is very rare.

"Waiter, there aren't any flies in my soup!"

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

"Of course you're bored, sweetie. It's the fin de siècle."

'You give me goose bumps!'

Weather forecast

'It's for my teacher. Do you have one with love spelled right?'

'No, I said put the money in the Caymen Islands.'

"Remember I promised you some fun and games in the bedroom?"

A robber halds up a hair salon with a hairdryer pointed at the customers - 'Hand over all your hair restorer or I'll blow you away!'