Creationism Debaters Gifts

'Palintology'

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

The Origin of Creationism

Needless to say, God forgot the legs.

Flat-earthers and round-earthers reach a compromise.

"This'll show the Theology Department."

"We Tell No One"

'So, I take it that diversity isn't a priority?'

"Can atheists refuse to participate?"

Adam and Eve in tug of war with cavemen.

Gorillas in the jungle.

The Scones-Monkey Trial. Dear god-fearing jurors, I make a simple common-sense point: Of course man and monkey are not physically related. Have a look for yourself. Move to strike the example. Too late! They both stink. Hey!

"'Why am I up here?' you ask! Let me give you a tip, bro; walking on land is the only way to go, if you want to avoid extinction!"

Frogs jump out of boiling water, but linger in gradually heated water.

"I like it, but let's replace the 'evolved from apes' bit with something more plausible - like a talking snake."

Bidenism: Let's Do 1/2 of a Lot of Good Things

"So you can take it with you!"

'Ingredients: chicken, eggs ... Hey, the chicken DID come before the egg.'

Grassy Knoll Creationism: 'More potshots at evolution.'

'Praying to Richard Dawkins is futile, my son.'

"Oh , shoot - how could I have forgotten to tell them about the dinosaurs?"

What Should Jeff Bezos Do With "His" $131 Billion?

Occupy God's Vacuum

'Evolution? You're suffering from delusions of grandeur. You were a born a monkey, are a monkey, and always will be a monkey.'

Plunder Globally, Media-Manage Locally

'I've got nothing to wear!'

Political speech

"Wake up, Tom. You're having the American dream again."

'What proof do we have there is a DOG?'

"Are you sure this flood was caused by God? Could it be caused by global warming?"

Evolution

"Yesterday, militant atheists killed moderate atheists for not being atheist enough."

Question: if left up to natural selection which one of these two would be more likely to survive?

If People Believed in Heaven and Hell

I hear you're an atheist now. It's the thing to be. What about me? What about you? I have the power to destroy you. So. I am your god! Rethinking position.