Craftsmen Gifts

'Dad, the kid who lives here has broken your hammer with his head.'

Annual sportknitting Derby

I'm a craftsman but no one can afford to pay me anymore. Please help.

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Shoe Shine/Lace Tie

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

'My mom's the greatest surgeon this side of Mayo brothers.'

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

"Lovely dovetail."

Arts and crafts

D.I.Y

Waiting for retirement.

I love embroidery

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

Hammer and chisel discussing what they've been doing, chisel says; 'Oh you know, getting into a few scrapes.'

Posh Easter Egg

Multitool Knife

Guru about mountaintop covering: 'My wife knitted it.'

Education and Apprenticeships

The Sculptor

"I'm the ghost of woodshop past."

'Apart from his awful workmanship, my hubby's handy work is fine.'

'I had a cough at the time!'

Luthier

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

"Any chance you could do it at a higher resolution?"

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

Nick Offerman

Little boy blows a larger bubble than glass blower can.

Darn you, you stupid hammer!

Home maintenance

Stage producer.

"So. Are you a mime, a puppeteer, or a ventriloquist?"

An artist creates a sculpture of a "thumbs up" and is then crushed by it.

"Bob's a tool belt."