Cozy Humorist Gifts

"Have you got room for a hand-knitted pullover?"

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

'That was close...hit me right in the wallet.'

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

"It's over, Martin. I've met someone with bigger cheeks."

Tunnel of Like.

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

You know, the snowballs we get in the summer are better. They're flavored!

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

'You've had enough!'

"Of course I've been drinking!"

Shaved Ice

It's not what's outside that interests me. It's what's inside!

Daffodil bulbs

'I love you, Howard, but let's not jump to conclusions.'

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

Homophone Encounter

"Or...we could suggest a three-way."

Snow is falling...

Dating in 2020

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

"I'm feeling adventurous today, Penny – let's tack on a block."

"Wow! That's an amazing welding project!"

'For the last time, Butchie, I love you but I'm not in love with you.'

"I never turn into a prince on a first date."

'I hear they wrote their own vows.'

'Vacuums!'

'Have a drink while I slip into something comfortable.'

Surreal Ale Pub.

'Marriage might suck the life out of our relationship.'

"Milton Woolburg, founder of traditions, legends, and general flimlam."