Cozy Couch Enthusiast Pillows

'Yours, is one of the worst cases of acrophobia I've ever seen.'

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

'Get up and put your house slippers on! - You'll be late for home school!'

"I'm having a pajama day."

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

"Why do they call what we're wearing 'sweats'?"

Item #3715 - cozy cardigan

Moving in

Just because I'm adapted to the cold, doesn't mean I like it!

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

"Tell me why you think people are out to get you."

'Ask your doctor if getting your fat butt off the couch might be right for you!'

"There really is such a thing as having too many pillows."

Baby blanket.

"Infinity scarf"

"Aren't you glad we stayed in? I had time to order us some more sweatpants."

"Just sitting here widening. You?"

Frigid Cold

Eventual Motion Machine

Exercise vs Laxative.

"C'mere, space heater."

"Well, if I was ambitious, we'd have a nice house and more money, but I'd never be around."

The black cat sat on the mat...absorbing all the heat of the fire.

'Dr Freud, this isn't comfortable. Why don't you sit on that chair?' 'That's not a bad idea.'

"If women are te weaker sex, how come they get most of the duvet?"

Carl receives the dreaded call to return to in person work. (man in pajama, wrapped in blanket and scruffy dropping his phone when he is told to return to in person work)

You know you're getting old when....

"I'll always love you just the way I am."

"You need the exercise, so I bought you a bigger remote."

"Comfy?"

Keeping Warm

"How much for the couch without the potato?"