Couch Enthusiasts Pillows

'I don't know if there's a word for it, but it's the opposite of multitasking.'

"At least he's doing a lot of reading about walking and exercise."

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

Binge Watch

"Goal!"

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

"Can't we have 'PRESS BUTTON' to shut up the commentator's gobbledegook."

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

"I wish I could lay there all day watching funny cat videos..."

"Tell me why you think people are out to get you."

"I really like this one – but I'm afraid of getting hurt again."

'Son, you can cancel your plans to backpack across Europe after graduation. See? Your father put up the old pup tent instead!'

"At our age I'd say we have about two or three binge watches left in us."

I don't want to go out, I just want to stay in.

"Baldo, do you have a summer reading list?"

'Ask your doctor if getting your fat butt off the couch might be right for you!'

"I see a couch."

Staycation Photos

"He tried living in the fast lane, but he didn't like it, so now he just sleeps all day."

E-Z Livin'

Sleep. The magazine for people who are asleep.

'When did we lose our targeted audience status?'

"Stuffing your face while watching TV does cause obesity."

Exercise vs Laxative.

'The best part about working from home is NOT working from home.'

Eventual Motion Machine

'I'd say the couch is contouring a bit TOO much to their bodies.'

"Thanks so much for letting me crash here, I really appreciate how unassertive you are."