Courtroom Sketch Artist Gifts

Courtroom sketch artist at Donald Trump hush money trial has a suitcase full of orange pastels.

'At this point you're supposed to enter a plea -- you can't buy a vowel.'

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"Just for the heck of it, how do you plead?"

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

"Bailiff."

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

Junior barrister prompting a deaf and testy chief

"You can't plead cute."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

"#notguilty."

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"Have you, or any of your acquaintances, ever been described as 'frolicsome'?"

Lawyer to bad hair lady: 'It's difficult to establish pain and suffering based on a bad hair day.'

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

'I'd like to go back to law school and pay attention this time.'

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

'You can't reject my manuscript without due process!'

'What's the big thrill about Budgie Jumping!?'