Courtroom Aficionado Pillows

As it turned out, that was a lie too.

'During discovery we found five more things to bill about.'

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

'Remember, Son - You're never too young to litigate.'

'Would you please stop describing yourself as my criminal lawyer?'

'Hell hath no furry like the lawyer of a woman scorned.'

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty by reason of a living Constitution!'

'Are you going to believe me, or a bunch of busybody cops?'

"It seems a juror is requesting to be sequestered."

Next on the court's docket: 'The Defense of marriage. . .'

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

'We're hoping to end the cycle of violence with a cycle of lawsuits.'

'Grand theft auto is not a disease like any other!'

'You can't sentence the defendant to serve jury duty also.'

"I'm a paralegal. I don't exactly represent the defendant, but I'm in his corner, so to speak."

My wife is talking to me again- through her solicitor.

Can I Watch?

"Can you name all nine Supreme Court justices?"

I love Lawyers

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

"I object!" "Overruled!"

John W. Law., John W. Law Jr., Robert Law, Janet Law, Attorneys at Law

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

Yawning barristers in court

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'

"Assisting me with this delicate procedure is Dr. Warren. He's one of the top specialists in avoiding malpractice suits."

Pre-Minstrel Tension

'Don't blame the lawyer!'