Courthouse Critic Pillows

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

Reading my Critics

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

"Never mind, Harry. Just remember, the 'Saturday Review' loved it."

"Heads up! It's another tidal wave of overwrought critical hyperbole!"

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

"If I Can Make One Critic Smile..."

"Try to get him away from that bloody whip...Pass it on."

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

"Did you read my review on Amazon? Four out of four people found it helpful."

A man on a giant book poses as Rodin's The Thinker.

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

Denazification

The new Physics

'He knows everything about art. But he doesn't know what he likes.'

"I think I'm as patient as the next person, but my husband wouldn't stop saying 'yo,' so I shot him."

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

'Bloomsbury Group, members only'

"This is a big seller, and we get them cheap...from China."

"Thank you, Mr. Mulvaney, but what we're really looking for is someone with talent."

Dog writes a review: 'A sublime book, I devoured it in one sitting ...'

Constructive Criticism 50c.

"Your honor, I intend to put the system on trial."

"You'll never believe who's here."

"Now this is what I call an honest little pub!"