Country Music Singer Pillows

Kris Kristofferson

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

"It's God's country, if your god wears camouflage and dips tobacco."

Bashful in Nashville

'I took your advice and got a long little doggy.'

Elvis Presley

'I can't write cheating songs because my wife's too insecure.'

Cockerel sings the blues...

"I'm putting you on country music."

For every moment in life there is a song that describes it perfectly.'

"I'll be broadminded up in heaven, but here on earth you're still a whore..."

'Woke up this morning found someone had stolen my guitar...'

Towny Music Night.

'I'll never forget the night I saw you across the crowded room of a dusty ol' honky tonk.'

"This is Kevin. Kevin was uncool before uncool was cool."

"It's bad, Doc. the voices in my head are singing country western."

A Modern Day Cowboy and his Horse.

"I came all the way from Alabama just to see you, Susanna. Why in tarnation are you cryin'?"

"Well of course you're depressed... You're a country and western singer."

"The harmonica! Boy you're lucky, my cowboy plays the double-bass! I tell you what, it's a pretty awkward thing to carry around..."

Supply was out of harps.

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Congerto Number One, first movement."

Hip-Hopalong Billy Bob blamed the censors for killing the country-rap scene.

'The grass is always bluer to a banjo pickin bovine!'

Lawyers Ridin' The Range: 'Happy trials to you, until we meet again!'

Where the deer and the antelope play.

Down On the Farm

This'n song here, "She Done Me Wrong 'n' That Ain't Right," goes out to my high school english teacher.

"Not tonight, hon—I've got a heartache."

Cowpunk

The Invention of Country Music.

'This next song is called Reindeer farts in my face all night.'

Ray Price, Willie Nelson, Merle Haggard